Conversational Connoisseur Gifts

Stilted Conversation.

"Oh gosh, have I been talking too much again?"

"Being smart is great! I wish I was smarter! But I would never want to be a smart Alex. That would be annoying."

'The meaning of communinication is the response we get'

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

"Could I ask just one question?"

Dialogue

"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."

The Gettysburg Address in process.

"But I see you're having difficulty following my argument."

GPC needs to make its new formula foolproof.

"Who knew we had so many dislikes in common?"

Men gossiping

With the popularity of spell-checkers, many people are turning to the new speech-checkers.

'Why don't you try seeing it from your point of view?'

"Help! I'm surrounded by idiots."

"It probably got lost in the voice mail."

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."

"I feel like I don’t even know my own husband ... and it’s driving me wild!"

'Your wife says you act like a fool. I thought you said she never pays attention to you.'

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

"Miss Duxbury, put me through to someone."

" I'm sorry. I was so busy listening to myself talk that I forgot what I was saying."

"Isn't us talking about how I would never take a ballroom dancing class an activity we're doing together?"

Telephone message - 'This is a recording. If you'd like to speak to a real live human being, forgetaboutit.

"I'm a great ... umm... like ... umm... like... umm ... communicator."

"My spokesperson won't speak to me."

Counselor. It's annoying that he always has to have the second-to-last word

Bill was so determined to Twitter no one dared tell him he couldn't do it with a calculator.

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

"No, no, that’s in a bar, Mr. President — you can talk politics and religion here."

Harvey went to the kitchen to top up his gin and tonic. When he came back, things took an unexpected turn.

Your Leaders Putting Words Into More Words

"I should warn you that many of John's thoughts are subliminal."