Convention Misfit Gifts

"I've been here three days and only just discovered I'm at the wrong convention."

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

'And as my chart clearly shows, I don't know anything.'

"To be honest, I don't mind the cold, and being an introvert, and slightly antisocial, I really treasure the quiet time when the others have flown south..."

"You'd think he hated music by the way he tortures it."

'You have no idea how hard I've gotta work just to maintain my indie cred around here!'

Do not think outside the box!

'Excuse me, I'm going to talk on the cellphone while pretending you're not here.'

'I thought I knew what a cubit was.'

"Well. . . either it's sinking, or you got the measurements wrong. . .!"

"This is the murder weapon the defendant used, your honor, and these are the tunes he butchered in cold blood."

'Louise, everyone is wearing that this year ... don't be such a sheep to fashion.'

"Don't worry, I'm a doctor."

'If this is 'Office Team Day' why are we wearing different colours?'

A man without a chicken on his head!

'I hereby sentence you to three years of piano lessons.'

"No, I've got nothing constructive to add. But I do know a funny joke I could tell."

"But aside from the lycanthropy, things have been pretty O.K."

'Now that I'm retired, I have time for state and national meetings, but I no longer need the information.'

Autumn Leaves

Tone Deaf and Can't Read Music - Please Give.

'Your medical coverage does not consider that a medical necessity.'

"Jerry always did sip from the cup of a different brewer."

Dating site - buy a dog.

"May I be candid, Hogarth? I should have thought a shrimp girl would make a more appropriate subject than a girl shrimp."

"Honestly, Kate—can you picture us in a shopping mall?"

"I'm pretty sure the definition leadership is the use of anger to motivate those who are already miserable."

"Ah, Reid. You obviously didn't get my, 'you're fired' text."

"Of course at this point, the egg salad went bad in the sandwich machine."

He's my vaguely familiar.

'Stan, wait!... Wrong game!'

'Not getting into university is not going to stop me doing the things I hoped to do...'

"I'm gay! I'm gay!"

"If music be the food of love, shut up."