Controversy Contemplator Gifts

"My parents wanted me to join the priesthood, but I didn't think I'd have the stomach for that much controversy."

Sisyphus during Covid

"I'm 59 and they say I'm middle aged. Just how many people do you know who are 118?"

Professional woman in pub

Coronavirus Debate

"I let go of all my earthly attachments, but there's one I can't seem to shake."

'What I especially like about being a philosopher-scientist is that I don't have to get my hands dirty.'

'Darn. His Holiness' letter says nothing about cancelling celibacy.'

Israeli soldier

'All the girls say the same thing. You're a sweet guy, but...'

"I wonder what happened in all those other timelines?"

"Speed is its defining quality - hence the name 'Large' Hadron Collider."

'I used to get ecstatic whenever I saw him. Now it's more like ecstatic cling.'

A man with the world on his mind inspects the world

'There's only one honest way to make money.'

Alcohol 'Nector of the Gods' 'Devils Brew!'

Art Gallery View.

'Nobody takes you seriously? -- Are you trying to be funny?'

The Master Switch

The nearness of you.

"The glass is half full�"

Samuel Beckett.

Really? A date with me is like a religious experience? How so? It reminds me of snake-handling.

I'm torn, Randy. I'm so undecided about this election. You're still undecided about the candidates? No, I'm undecided about whether to be undecided. On the one hand, it could make me seem like I'm unbiased. Like I'm not beholden to any particular ideology. Like I'm above it all. But on the other hand, it could make me look like I'm too dumb to tell the difference between things that are different. Take a couple weeks to ponder that. No rush.

"And the best-case scenario? How many more?"

'Just a heads up. The 'Big Guy' is not a fan of religion.'

Sad Humour

"Father, I would like to go to confession with you!"

"According to my financial advisor, dying was a lucky break before my savings ran out."

2020 Simulator

'What do you mean I'm not allowed to be indifferent about the Olympics?'

"Hmmm... I've NEVER like Blue Oyster Cult..."

"There you go again, trying to solve my problems. I'm not asking you to do that. I just need you to listen."