Control Seeker Gifts

No Surprises

Things That Aren't Problems At All That I Worry About the Most

"He who controls the Internet controls the world."

'Makes you feel in control, doesn't it?'

Control in the workplace.

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

Man Fishing: Pulling sign attached to hook from fish out of water: Gone Swimmin'

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

"Listen Herb, once you become the boss and decide who gets a raise, then you can have a raise."

Exit only.

"My wife has always encouraged me... ...to quit this stupid dream and get a real job." ... "You have a wife?"

'Bring me some more power.'

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

'Worker or Soldier: Is that all you can suggest? Not much of a choice is there!...'

'I'm looking for a job that satisfies my lust for power.'

Please stand by...I have temporarily lost my reason.

"No, no - I'm just looking for a balance of power that corrupts in moderation."

You Are Here...Your Nearest Wi-FI Signal Is Here.

'...and this is the Mess.'

"Wi-fi....Wi-fi...WI....FI!...."

Glass Ceiling

'Perhaps he's heard we're losing our churchwarden.'

"The boss loves the positive feedback he gets every time he says something."

"And how long till they start saying the 'Great' after my name."

Robot about to eat a battery

"I could have gotten to the top . . . but I wasted all my time in the park."

"Sure, you could make a good living in private industry, but believe me, you wouldn't be running any kingdoms."

"It's lonely here at the top. Thank goodness I've never been a people person."

"Ed's not really into binge watching...he just can't find the remote."

Last Reception for 200 Miles.

"It's summer and kids need an outlet...an electrical outlet!"

The real reason the Christmas Truce didn't last.

'Yes, it is last year's hunting license, but I'm only hunting the ones I missed last year.'