Contextual Commentator Gifts

'Wait a sec...do you want that comment off the record or out of context?'

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

Support the Ex-Troops

Thought for today: "All the world's a stage." - Shakespeare. And boy, are there a lot of drama critics.

Torturing the English Language

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

"We seem to be spending more on defence than on things to defend"

"What I do is pick up the morning paper, go through it carefully, and then, depending on how I feel about things, I either say the Pledge of Allegiance, stand there and do nothing, or walk out of the classroom."

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

'This country is on the road to ruin.' - 'Well, it'll never get there in this traffic.'

Press Freedom

"Ours is not a creative clan."

Ten Plagues for Today's Seder

The Working Woman's Magazine

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

"Have you heard? There's talk about raising the retirement age to 170?"

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

"At $4 a dozen, it's hard to balance a career and a family."

Government a la Carte

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

Coronavirus Impact on Children

"Lori, go ahead and toss in 'Lolita.' Now, what's next?" "We'll need more lighter fluid." "'The Lottery' is devils work." "We must protect the children." "Book burning club"

Taking Credit after Voting against Stimulus

'-and you're living proof that ALL men are not born equal, runt!'

Our Two Parties, Explained

'If no man is an island, then what the hell is no woman?'

Pity vs. Bragging and Public Relations

"Instead of singing, I'm going to scream offensive things as loud as I can just to get attention..."

The Berlin Peace Movement

Real Life/Surreal Life

"Are all Brits bisexual, or just the ones who publish their diaries?"

Apart from protest footage I forget what downtown looks like.

Critisize your weight.

'Amazing! We truly do live in a classless society.'