Contentment Questioner Pillows

'I was happier when I was unhappy.'

"Behold the secret to happiness."

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

'If I order pasta and she orders antipasta, did we really order anything?'

"What's this for poorer stuff?"

The bluebird of happiness couldn't make it. I'm the finch of eh, I can't complain.

'No, but thanks for asking.'

A Reasonable Time for Concern

"I'm the bluebird of low expectations."

"How do I know God is not real? For the same reason I know people on TV can't see me."

'How worse? Give me the worst-case scenario.'

'Is there a God? God knows...'

"A trough full of food, mud to roll around in: Who cares if we can't fly..."

"Good. I can hardly see your Catholic parents now."

"I have a movie plot idea... A girl is kidnapped at birth. She's threatened, oppressed, and lives in constant fear. Here's the twist - the kidnapper is only in her mind."

"Monogamy? In this economy?"

"And lo, we made God in our own image.."

A new study found that people with low expectations are more content.

"I do count my blessings, but then I end up counting those of others who have more and better blessings, and that pisses me off."

'Where are all these people who lived happily ever after?'

Hunter haunted by Bunnies.

"What happens to our soul if we're taxed out of existence."

'I've given up on looking for the bluebird of happiness. . . I'd settle for the chicken of contentment!'

"I'm thinking about working on something really big, but for now I'm just happy keeping my plants alive."

Atheist United - A Non-Prophet Organization

'Yeah, but I'd like to be led into temptation just once, to see how I'd do.'

"Are you listening to those bloody influencers again?"

'Through dieting I lost some weight ... I also lost my reason for living!'

"No, I'm not married. But that's beside the point. Now, quit changing the subject and answer the question."

Sin and Doubt Boxes in Hell.

The pursuit of happiness: 'I caught it once. It was OK - but in my opinion, didn't live up to the hype.'

'That's right, a person with 9 million is no happier than one with 8 million.'

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations, became savvy consumers, the lived reasonably contented forever after'

"I really like you, Grizzo, but I'm not ready to hibernate."

Door to door salesman sees sign: 'We have everything.'