Contemporary Art Admires Gifts

"I'm not quite sure what the artist is trying to say here!"

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

The Selfie

Wagging Dog

Cats at private view

"I just cleaned that glass! How can it already be covered in nose prints?!"

"It said this 'Spilt Coffee' series afforded her a lifetime of lattes."

Picasso: The Early Years

"I was going to call it 'Empty Plinth', but then I settled on 'Winter's Smile'...I wanted to capture the 'nothingness' of an 'absence of anything'..."

'What do you suppose he's trying to say?'

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."

"I'm working on more of a 'personal' mythology."

"Sometimes, Cheryl, I wonder why you only invite me along to cocktail parties."

"He's an abstract artist."

"Feel better, dear?"

"Picasso: Post cataract surgery."

Sold! For £42,000 to the... No wait - it's the wrong way round!

'Welcome to the house warming! The map points out what is furniture and what is sculpture.'

Anyone would think it's Frieze week...

"She said it has a blistering fervency that reminds her of a slide."

"Typical venue, just providing male washroom facilities!"

"Definitive." "Compelling." "Persuasive." "Upside down."

"It's wonderful, darling. It really says Manhattan."

"Don't you find her work just so wonderfully liberating!"

"It has great depth, realized with such a unique economy of paint application... yet, there remains a curious aura of drivel I can't dismiss."

Thermidor Dali

Master Artists' Computer Graphics: Michelangelo's 'God's Creation of the Adam Computer.'

'It's my main decorating motif.'

Artists Cats

Natürlich verstehst du es nicht. Er ist ein Künstler für Künstler.

'I like the frame.'

Sculptor's chippings