Consumer Electronics Enthusiast Gifts

'I know it's a nuisance, but they came as part of the home cinema package.'

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

"He's having a hard time finding work."

ACME INDUSTRIES NEW PRODUCTS DIVISION, 'The best part is, it can repossess itself!'

"Where's the business end of this thing?"

Dawing your Cellphone

You're telling me not to choose sides between Google and Apple. Precisely. Computer Villa. Stay neutral. Continue to support both companies. Emotionally. Right. By buying as much as you can from both companies. Doesn't that only benefit you? Heretic. Absolve yourself by upgrading your phone! Computer Villa.

Nerd tryouts.

'Don't leave baby alone with this really cool tiny phone. It's a choking hazard.'

Bicycle sat nav.

'E-books?'

"This new phone app for opening the beer is great, Bruce!"

'Ray's as excited as...well...as excited as a guy who just bought a snowblower on the eve of a storm.'

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

"I had an Android, then I switched to an iPhone. Then I went back to an Android, then I switched back to the iPhone. . ."

'When I said that I needed a new mouse...'

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

'I love this street...it's so real man...'

'Maybe a firewall isn't enough to protect our computer from worms and viruses. That's why I additionally installed this fence!'

'Since he bought the leaf blower I hardly ever see him.'

'Now where's my Tibbles got to?'

"I wish someone would come and turn the vibrating buzzer off on that mobile phone!"

"Turn on the news." "I will not comply." "My analysis of your viewing patterns has determined you will grow depressed after the lead story." "There is a 95% probability you will then gorge yourself on rocky road ice cream and then stay up all night googling elliptical machines and diet pills." "Who told you this?" "Both your refrigerator and your browser are gossipy."

'Still no improvement? Nurse, attach more gizmos.'

'Throw in your iPad and you've got a deal.'

The secret lives of household things.

'Yes, technology has come a long way, but the baby won't have a touch screen.'

'Better buy one now - before they make them too big to fit into your house.'

Desert wifi

"Sorry, gotta go - I'm going to be late for my next meeting."

"Pretty impressive for a product of a 3-D printer."

'These new metal detectors are great!'

"That vulture just appeared and started picking at my phone. My battery must have died."

"This new system is too complex...pass it on."

'I don't care if an app on your phone is monitoring you, you still need a baby sitter when your father and I are gone.'