Consumer Advocacy Superhero Pillows

'We'll be open on Christmas day, 'cause we decided we hadn't driven our employee's enough into the ground on Thanksgiving.'

Sen. Krupt. I don't tell constituents that we're fueling inflation. I say we're protecting consumers and thanks to us they won't have to worry about buying any cheap stuff.

...And he calls himself the 'Green' Giant...

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

'We're here to carbon date your company's carbon footprint.'

Politically Correct Snowperson

"He's the chief watchdog, who watches over all the other watchdogs—but this must be his night off."

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'Do you ever think about how we can reduce our global footprint?'

"Not much in the way of loot, but we got a ton of store credit."

"Plastic straws. No fish were spared in the making of this product."

"The tuna is endangered, the lettuce was recalled and the tomatoes were hit by a drought. I can give you mayo on a roll."

Gullib-Os

"Yikes! So many foundations, so little time."

STRIP Hambone: Expensive repair job

'... Further to our telephone conversation of the 3rd, my fax of the 11th, my letters of the 16th, 23rd and 28th, my emails of....'

Mixed Nuts (but mostly peanuts)

Consumer Protection Agency/Manufacturer Protection Agency

'Sir, there's a taxpayer who knows his rights, to see you.'

'Our definition of a 'bargain' is right there in the small print.'

'Do you sell eggs? . . . I forgot to say that I have middle class guilt. . .'

'So Chief Executive how can you justify this new increase in gas prices?'

Big oil.

Rudolph goes green (with his new compact fluorescent nose)

"Here's a bunch of money. We need you to save America...as we know it."

"Rest assured, we will be working hard to stop the onslaught of scammers and the scourge of robocalls..."

"Hey, didn't I vote for you?"

'I'm just so worried about mercury in the water and sulfur dioxide in the air.'

"This banana I bought yesterday, when I peeled it it was empty!"

Malls admit to using cell phones to track shoppers.

Duel Fuel?

B.B.C. Watchdog

Driving a Lemon.

'Which' Consumer Testing Whiskies

"Invasion of privacy? You should be flattered we're so concerned about satisfying your consumer desires!"