Considering Nursing Home T-Shirts

Expensive nursing home

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

Retirement homes' 'pill fight'.

Every so often, Madeline gets carried away.

'Next!'

'No need to yell son, I may be deaf, but I can still read.'

"Who says you can't teach an old dog new tricks?"

'You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake!'

"We settled into the one-level after our hips got bad."

Old Frogs' Home

Old woman with trolley full of medication.

Weather channel.

'Come die with me.'

"He thinks it's the weather channel."

James Bond: Senior Years.

Tired Woods

'...makes a change from the zimmer frames!'

"That's not what I meant when I suggested rocking on the porch, Mr. Clampwell."

Remembering His Marbles

"We're trying to give geriatrics a sexier image..."

"Sometimes I wonder about what our patients have to take."

To make taking their daily array of medicines more fun, many seniors are using the new Pill-A-Pult.

On today's Ask Sadie Radio Hour, we discuss one topic: the constant flirtation with fleeing to Canada. Canada has universal health insurance, far fewer killings, much less bigotry, more social mobility, better schools, less obesity, 50 weeks maternity leave, blah blah blah. But that means nothing, because you know what they don't have? Panicky media telling you who to blame for the sky falling! We'll be back, after this message from Depends Undergarments.

"I hate it when I walk into a room and forget why I went in there. Especially when it's the bathroom."

'Don't Move!' - 'Why would I want to move? Lived here for 51 years, know all the neighbours, shops nearby, post office is closed but...'

'Ain't it great, Wally, to be over the hill and not under it!'

'Mr. Franklin. What did I tell you about wheelies in the hallway?'

'Be assured about you mother's memory - we back up all the residents onto hard disk once a week.'

Sunshine Retirement Villa: Pool, Golf, Tennis and Financial Planner.

'You're always bragging about what a good actor you are, so why don't you act your age?!'

Home for the elderly

The Old Elves Home

"A 12 month tour of the USA costs us less than staying at home for a year."

Gen X in the Golden Years.

"He used to own a muscle car."