Connoisseur Of Fine Wines T-Shirts

"Well, so much for vinho verde parties!"

'A cheeky red?'

Bacchus.

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

'... And this is my cellar.'

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

"I find that hugely offensive!"

'You certainly have a well equipped workbench.'

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

"I make it myself!"

Wordplay: Export.

"I'm prescribing a mild sedative. Go wine shopping and get yourself a nice Chablis."

"Hmmm ... perhaps a pinot noir less spilly?"

"My secret is having a ton of money to buy the best ingredients."

Leo McKern

"I'm getting plasma, iron and platelets. RH positive!"

'My - You've matured, my dear.'

'Been toying with Bordeaux futures again, have we?'

Yes. As a matter of fact he IS an indoor cat.

You are simply the Greatest

'I don't get it, I've only served that guy water all evening.'

"I will have the riesling, and a thimble of your best pinot noir for the little lady."

French Army knife

Three people view wine price 3 ways.

'The first rule of enjoying fine wine is to make sure you and the wine are in the same room.'

"I spent all day looking for this Malbec, not that anybody cares."

"It doesn't matter if the glass is half empty or half full if you have a case."

"Pinot Noir, God's apology for White Zinfandel."

"At last! Something that goes well with us!"

'I should have told you, every Friday senior partners get to do the Prosecco Polonaise.'

"I've joined a wine-lovers club. . . so far there are only three members."

"You may not know this, but I've become quite the wine expert."

"Champagne always makes her light-headed."