Condor Enthusiast Gifts

'According to the weight chart, if you were a condor, you'd have a wingspan of 97 feet.'

'According to the weight chart, if you were a condor, you'd have a wingspan of 97 feet.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

Tangled Earphones Support Group.

'Some idiot's pulled the plug out!'

A rare picture of Henry VIII's divorce lawyer.

Crocodile Food Pyramid

'Because we're still part of society - that's why we have to go organic.'

Thor's Other Tools

Crocodile Shoes

'I'm afraid, 'in a while crocodile' was the incorrect answer.'

"My kitchen is very small. Do you have any with doors that swing in?"

'Anne Boleyn now regrets avoiding that Prenup Chit Chat with King Henry.'

"Bandit is very sorry about your expensive drone and wants to say it will never happen again."

Sinlge-white-male seeking single-female who enjoys, silence, long long walks, and scorpions.

'Yeachh! This isn't easy when they're not potty trained.'

'Hang on, Donny - Heimlin...Heinlit..dang! How do you spell that thing'

'What's the situation about new wands these days?' - 'You can't beat 'compare wands.com.'

Filming the Crocodile.

'Please! Take these and let my buddy go!!'

'A young lady does not say 'Caw Caw', a young lady says, 'Hello, I'm a crow of quality'.'

'If it was mine, I'd put it up for sale, invest the proceeds, and get myself a nice little condo.'

"Swipe left." Henry VIII

Two particles outside Hadron Collider; 'Fancy getting smashed this evening?'

Thomas Wolsey

Henry VIII

"My son, the crocodile!"

'You have to pick up your game: My dentist says you've neglected to clean my back teeth...'

"I need your help to drain the swamp."

Henry VIII

Queen Elizabeth I

"Wouldn't one pen in your pajamas suffice?"

"I'm only eating vegans now and honestly, I feel so much healthier."

'Purple Martin Condos'