Wand Enthusiast Gifts

'What's the situation about new wands these days?' - 'You can't beat 'compare wands.com.'

"I still plan to be a cowboy when I grow up. If I'm going to service my share of the national debt, I might as well have fun doing it."

'This wasn't quite the fairytale ending that Colin had anticipated...'

'Awright...Who's the dirty, lowdown varmint who's copyin' my plaid-shirt-and-stone-wash-jeans-with-matching-boots-and-vest ensemble?'

L'il Buckaroo on Board.

Butterfly herders of the wild west.

Dawing your Cellphone

"I'll tell ya what we don't need is some Dr. Durango helping us with a dang snake bite."

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

Brünnhilde's Funeral Pyre

'Look Reg, a ship...we're saved!'

Airport Security. Just pass the wand over them, Ernie. Keep your "abracadabras" to yourself.

Non-violent Western (Cowboys with water pistols).

"You're right -- this town is big enough for the both of us."

The circus diver.

Brickie's Mate

"Mom, Dad - I'm a sidekick. I've always been a sidekick. And I want you to know that I have a pardner."

"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"

'I always thought a dogfight was a lot of snarling and walking around stiff-legged.'

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

'People have been known to lose an eye when a wink goes seriously wrong.'

"They tell me you're a man who has True Magritte."

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

Cowboy directions 'Up yonder', 'Down yonder', 'This-A-Way' and 'That-A-Way'.

Louis L'Amour hones his craft.

"Wait, I've got sand in my shoe."

"'City Slickers' was O.K., but, let's face it, it was no 'Claire's Knee.'"

Emma Watson

"....and some apple pie for dessert...oh miss, remember that a la mode!"

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

"I'm just gonna reach in my back pocket real slow-like and turn off my ringer."

Cowboy at mechanic with horse hoisted

"I guess there ain't room in this town for two bonsai specialists."

"This one has nicer sand, but I think I prefer the tree on the last one we saw."

Wild West Text Showdown