Wand Enthusiast Pillows

'What's the situation about new wands these days?' - 'You can't beat 'compare wands.com.'

"I still plan to be a cowboy when I grow up. If I'm going to service my share of the national debt, I might as well have fun doing it."

"I'll tell ya what we don't need is some Dr. Durango helping us with a dang snake bite."

Dawing your Cellphone

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

L'il Buckaroo on Board.

Brünnhilde's Funeral Pyre

'Look Reg, a ship...we're saved!'

Non-violent Western (Cowboys with water pistols).

"You're right -- this town is big enough for the both of us."

The circus diver.

'I always thought a dogfight was a lot of snarling and walking around stiff-legged.'

"Mom, Dad - I'm a sidekick. I've always been a sidekick. And I want you to know that I have a pardner."

'People have been known to lose an eye when a wink goes seriously wrong.'

Brickie's Mate

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

Cowboy directions 'Up yonder', 'Down yonder', 'This-A-Way' and 'That-A-Way'.

"I guess there ain't room in this town for two bonsai specialists."

"I'm just gonna reach in my back pocket real slow-like and turn off my ringer."

"Wait, I've got sand in my shoe."

Louis L'Amour hones his craft.

Cowboy at mechanic with horse hoisted

"'City Slickers' was O.K., but, let's face it, it was no 'Claire's Knee.'"

"....and some apple pie for dessert...oh miss, remember that a la mode!"

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

"This one has nicer sand, but I think I prefer the tree on the last one we saw."

Wild West Text Showdown

'The autopsy revealed he was indeed a yellow-bellied, lily-livered varmint!'