Condo Connoisseur T-Shirts

'Can you believe it? They still haven't picked up the trash.'

"My kitchen is very small. Do you have any with doors that swing in?"

'Purple Martin Condos'

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

"This stool shall pass."

"OK, last time: Cado teak lounge chair from Denmark – me. Doggy bed – you."

Electric Blanket.

The Complete Spaghetti Dinner.

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

Dog Walker

Shaved Ice

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

Bats with blankets.

'Why is laying around watching movies considered cozy, but laying around watching football is considered lazy?'

Man frozen in portrait pose.

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

"That will be the gold standard by which all other naps are judged."

"Just think how much we could save if we switched the heating off altogether."

Moliere

Charles Dickens.

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

C Day Lewis.

Bleak House

"Most of my consumerism is self-taught."

'The fire seems to be drawing well.'

'It has a zip-out lining in case of a mild winter.'

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

"Have you seen the walk-in broom closet?"

'I know, I left the electric blanket on too long.'

All set for the big sleep, Frank? I'm getting there. I've been storing up fat for the winter. And how about Ernie? He's trying something different this year. He's got wi-fi, a game console and virtual reality googles. He's going to cybernate.

Leslie would regret bringing her cat to the pet store.

"It's nice, but how do you adjust the sleep number?''

The 'I'm Almost Finished With War And Peace' Bookmark

"Hold on there buddy, that's not a KJV Bible." (two men talking, one with a Bible)