Condiment Queen Pillows

"Ah! The Amazing Mommy and her tray of condiments!"

Lady of the Cake.

Assault 'n' Vinegar

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

It turns out they don't go together so well,

Flying sauces.

Man cooking a single sausage on a very large barbeque.

"Bob takes everything with a grain of salt...and pepper...and garlic..."

'Thanksgiving's no holiday for turkeys or the women who cook them.'

Tabletop Theatre

'Ok. Now I'm sexy.'

Mayo-A-Mayo

"I don't bake, I don't cook, but I make one kick-ass vinaigrette."

'Mustard, ketchup and mayo are all nice and creamy smooth. Why isn't anything being done about relish?'

'Oops! It's usually the devil to get any to come out!'

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

A sick sandwich is in the hospital and is getting a transfusion on new Maya and Zesty Mustard.

Chef Cake Topper

"Ah — excellent catsup."

'You've got to admit, Harvey, the barbecue sauce is REALLY hot down here!'

The sword in the all-natural impossible-to-stir peanut butter.

"Hey, this is just a bun!" "Help yourself to the mustard."

Stand back - while I whip something up

'Your tomato ketchup is on it's way, Sir...'

'When I grow up, I want to be just like you.'

"Do you have to put tomato sauce on everything?"

'You can't call it a miracle drug just because you added miracle whip!'

Beating Dad at Chess.

"Sorry, honey, I used up all the sunblock. How 'bout we cover you in mayonnaise instead?"

'Well, fancy meeting you here.'

Dijon Vu