Concealed Carry Queen Pillows

'Does this outfit make my concealed weapon look big?'

Looks like another day in which. . . I have to run the world, the country, the business and the household!!!

Pajama Day 743

All Natural Nothing

Housewife feeding her washing machine with a brief.

Balancing work and family

"I had to skip my workout."

The wooden clothes horse of Troy.

The candy house, if the tale of Hansel and Gretel would happen today.

'It was only 500 yds across but as he visualised the GPS blind spot the risks seemed immense.'

"Good news! She's asking for her Banana Republic and Williams-Sonoma catalogues."

'Ok. Now I'm sexy.'

"I dreamt we got a 'sorry you were out' card."

Well, I finished my summer reading list – now what?

"Any chance of upping the affection quota, given the current situation?"

If Dr. Chan has a schoolteacher husband, a diabetic mother-in-law, twins in preschool, and a daughter who stays with her father across town on alternate weekends, and one twin and the daughter have colds, how many free rapid COVID tests are required to alleviate Dr. Chan's breaking-point levels of despair?

I love embroidery

"They remove people who have become 'jammed in armchairs' due to COVID 19 lockdown!"

The household cavalry

"I'll be glad when this is over and Sarah can be herself again."

Sew on a sequin!

Von Trapp family masks

"This lockdown is GREAT! - We can spend all day on our computers, eating takeaway junk food and watching crap TV while gambling on our iphones!"

"Dad, did you know Tia Carmen got a job at my school cafeteria?"

"Here's to us, kid—and the healing powers of raw juices."

"Aways the victim."

'Now that we all agree on the agenda, a show of hands on how many want to keep it hidden.'

"Can you perform under pressure?"

Omicron: "Viva 2022!"

"You call this social distancing?"

A man sprays a bug in an organic foods shop.

'Aside from your plastic canvas projects, what else have you been doing since you retired?'

An apple a day!

Exercising in Confinement

Health Foods; "When did I ever eat back pain and trigger fingers?"