Computer Expert Gifts

"I have to admit, that's the first time I'd ever heard the term 'tech support' incorporated into wedding vows."

"Is there a geek of any kind in the house?"

'I can't stay out very long...I have to help my father with his computer.'

'He's our computer expert.'

Will Hack For Food

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

The Anti-Agent

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

"No, Mother, I don't think Julian Assange is going to leak your recipe for fruitcake."

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

"You work well without supervision? Fat chance of that happening in here!"

Dad Trophies

'Mark my word, Walters, this is no ordinary virus.'

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

"Good heavens William, what have you downloaded off the internet this time?"

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

Shaped Much Different: Vietnam and Afghanistan.

"Don't deny it. You only wanted me for my metadata."

"Careful! He knows computers."

"Looks like Brandon got caught with his hand in the password jar."

'...And, from what I understand, they don't have any hard drive at all.'

"It's a fantastic computer! It's so old that none of today's hackers know how to hack it!"

Roger Buffle Jr. supplies his father with yet another computer password.

"Thanks for considering me for the job as head of cybersecurity, but I already hacked into your network and gave myself the job."

"So who is this First pet?"

Cyb-R Safe: Offering the most convincing illusion of on-line security available today!

Clickbait

'Kumor's responsible for all the computer passwords, so the boss had him encrypted.'

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"