Competition Buff Gifts

Bessy had won the 100m sprint... but many suspected Steeroid abuse!

Sales Chart

Race

The bastards have hired a personal trainer!

'Would you like an energy drink?'

"You're determined to win that Turner Prize, aren't you Gavin?"

Competition within the Physics Department heats up.

AD 763. Hopeful entrants in the first Easter Island Idol competition.

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"Stock options for your thoughts."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

"In recognition of last month's little upward blip, I suggest we allow ourselves a spontaneous victory fist bump."

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

A fight in the Boardroom.

"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

'Let me worry about the one percent inspiration, you just take care of the 99 percent perspiration.'

"What's a debenture?"

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

Business meeting, CEO is dressed strangely as he asks: 'Any questions?'

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

'He's so rich, when he writes a cheque the bank bounces.'

Royal Mail boss to become ITV boss.

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.