Compassionate Knight Fan Gifts

Oh, don't hurt it. Can't you trap it under a glass, or something?'

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

Knight Golfing

"NOW can I shoot you out of a cannon?"

'Isn't it cute the way they compete so hard?'

Missing You.

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

'I'm re-enacting a battle with my conscience.'

Dragon Recycling the Knights it has defeated

S.P.F. 1,000

"Take the picture, dam it, take the picture!"

'He'll stop being so smug when he gets his first dent.'

Sir Jasper Murgatroyd

'The knights are drawing closer'

"I was hoping you'd consider this a prelude to a kiss."

Knights Wing Mirrors.

"We'll settle this the old-fashioned way - with a dance-off."

Light RELIEF for England . . . PHEW!

Don Quichotte

Don Quilowatte

Knights' Status Report: Rusted out, Metal fatigue, Popped rivets, Bad welds, Squeaky hinges, Dents and dings.

'Yes, I wanted a knight in shining armour, but I didn't know it'd be me doing all the shining!'

'But sinister gales - with that armour?'

"My lord, Sir Arthur is pleased to bid thee welcome to his food court."

'My kingdom for a horse! Are you nuts? How about high yielding mutual funds?'

"Mom, this isn't what I meant when I said I wanted to be Iron Man for Halloween."

"Don't be such a baby. You're officially an endangered species, so I'm going to have to earmark you."

Unicorn Joust

World Cup Fan.

Inside voice!

They're souvenir magnets from all the places we've done battle.

'Well, Mr. Harris, I'm afraid you simply care too much. You have compassion fatigue.'

I think he's a bit OCD. He checked my chastity belt is locked, six times!

The Man of La Mancha,and his sidekick, the Man of La Muncha.

'And we're just a stone's throw from the beach.'