Company Culture Observer Gifts

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

The trend toward less formal offices began to gain steam.

The Evolution of the Bonus

'Pssst! Straighten up, here come the bigwigs.'

'Believe me, I know transformation isn't easy. I pulled a muscle once.'

'You did turn the company around... but we liked it the way it was...'

'Bit of a staffing problem, Boss. We haven't got any left.'

"To address this mistake we must be professional and use root-cause analysis. I'll start by saying it's not my fault...."

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."

'I give this one about three months...'

"I'll put your application on file, Mr. Brandt, but I'm quite happy with my current paperweight."

"I'd heard that Farnsworth had a difficult secretary to get past."

"On this team we take off our jackets,but we don't loosen our ties."

"Damn it,Frank,if I can't bully my staff, who can I bully?"

'We used to be a patriarchy, but lately we've been more goddess-centric.'

'I like people.. but not a whole lot.'

"You realize, of course, that I'll have to make a big show of having security escort you out."

"...in other news: Google has been admitted to the United Stations..."

'I have no one to blame but myself, for now.'

"It's not downsizing—it's just that we have 976 employees who have chosen to spend more time with their families."

"They grow up so fast."

'Lateral hires are always told we do things differently here.'

The token incompetent: "Hey - don't ask me."

'Another nice thing about working here, they tend to promote from within.'

'It's either the worst idea to attract new clients I've ever seen, or the best...'

'Mr. Donovan, is it all right if I tie my shoelace?'

How it feels to be in a company with poor communication.

We're one big happy family here. What I'm looking for is a man who can make it work.

"You're just buying time, Peterson! I want those figures on my desk by tomorrow!"

"I'm a retriever but I prefer 'Go-Getter'."

"I have a recurring nightmare where the paradigm keeps shifting without me."