Commuting Jokester Gifts

Prehistoric school bus stop.

'I used to commute. Now I transform.'

Excess Baggage: Before starting your rental car, be sure the radio is turned all the way down.

"Take me home now!"

Motorway notices reading: 'Fog. But if you can read this, it isn't that bad'.

"I dreamed last night that I had a job within walking distance."

"Road construction used to bother me. But compared to all the craziness going on in the world, I'll take this any day."

How do fish get to work?

Beep' 'beep' 'beep' 'beep'' - 'Slam!' - 'Great... another long week of pain and humiliation ahead...' - ''Click'' - 'God, Ilove my job.' - '' -

Martian Rovers find proof of intelligent life on the red planet.

Trapeze artists commuting

Things Women Never Say: 'Sorry I'm late boss. I was talking to my husband and he wouldn't stop listening.'

Honey I'm Home

"You remind me very much of myself when I was your age, Carter, and there is no way that this company would employ such a person."

65. Whenever I'm in the mood to watch the rest of the world go by, I simply keep to the legal speed limit.

Metrocard error messages

Need a Lawyer?

Man on tube using dreadlock as support.

"We need someone who's responsible."

'Turn right at the first $4.09 unleaded, then a hang a left at $4.03 unleaded, and over the bridge, past the $4.01 unleaded...'

Metro North Entrance: Closed because it's broken.

Tortoise is snail taxi.

"Me, it's not a shower I crave for after a hard day at work, it's a long, long, long bath..."

"It's the wrong type of tracks on the snow."

'This one's a hood ornament. I got it for carpooling.'

'I don't like this. . .'

'Trouble is, I only want to wear them for cycling to work.'

"For your information, this 'stuff' happens to be my husband!"

"I have found a house in your price range, but it will be a long commute every day from Greenland."

"... Yes, I know there's a hole in your ceiling. Why do you think we're called, the star view motel?"

Being vertically challenged, I never realized my dream of becoming a pro basketball player. But on a trip to work, it was just like I was a hoops star! I spilled some coffee when walking. I dribble whenever my feet are in motion. I took a selfie when I stopped at the ATM - it was a nice bank shot. Then as I neared the office, I came down the lane - and made an impressive display of driving and dunking. I should be getting a big shoe sponsorship contract any day now!

Pamplona bull instructions - Running with the Idiots.

Bus Stop Evolution

"...He's been going to work in a wheelie bin. He says its quicker, cleaner and less cramped"

'I'll fix you! But Good!'