Community Watch Member Gifts

I've managed to put a positive spin on this month's crime statistics.

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'Wentworth Street, Whitechapel'

"Don't you think you're taking this whole, 'neighbourhood watch' thing a little too serious, dear?"

'Best watchdog I ever had!'

"My wish is simple—to give something back to the community."

STRIP *Community Care * Squeezing it all in before lunch

'She's the worst gossip I've ever come across.'

"Bob, you've been warned before. You can't come to prayer just to gather gossip material."

"This neighborhood has a strong sense of community that borders on siege mentality."

"I'm starting to miss the summer people. It's been weeks since I glowered."

"Hello. . . I'm new in town. Do you know where the local police station is? - I need to sign in. . !"

'He lives in a house, and it's by the side of the road, but he's still not a friend to man.'

"What?! You called for Souper Man, right?"

'The neigborhood's best watchdog!'

"...Apparently we're responsible for snow removal on that stretch of highway we adopted."

"Meals on Wheels"

'Does that mean things are getting better or worse?'

Suspicious Person Ban.

Neighbourhood watch and slug watch.

'Yeah, neighborhood crime. That's what I watch all the time 'cause our TV is broken.'

'You can close rural Post Offices on-line now.'

'Well, that ties up the inventory of our new neighbours' possessions.'

Community service paints Stonehenge grey.

"Neighborhood Watch anti-violence meeting. Be there or else."

"Ever wonder what goes on over there?"

'That should put a stop to them.'

Capital Building of trash

'Apparently we're to use the budget that's been cut to encourage the volunteers we haven't got because they've been put on schemes to fill in for services that no longer exist.'

'I'm going back as a ghost. It's time to give something back to the community.'

Welcome signs 'Pinefalls, pop 186, plus 3 atheists we don't like to mention'

Neighbourhood watch with mother

Even with the new freedom of information act I can't tell you if that woman at number 28 is really only 76...