Communication Coaches Pillows

"I am communicating. One picture is worth a 1000 words!"

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

Inclusive speech

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

Couples' therapy

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

'Some of these trees have been here for 2000 years... and they still can't talk. Man, we're awesome!'

"It's a new target to target a time to reduce targets so that we'll be less target driven!"

'No, I'm the marriage counselor. What you need is the semantics counselor down the hall.'

Teamwork

"And finally, I'd like to take any questions from the floor."

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

"So, what you're telling me is: I have unusually high negatives for a third-year husband..."

"Harold, you've changed."

Letter Collecting Nerd

"Everything you say (or don't say) matters. Choose your words and intentions carefully."

"'Original' to 'Carbon-Paper': Do you copy?"

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."

'You're good with people. Just tell him to go fuck himself.'

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

WHO checklist

'Let us pray...'

'Come on, Walter, you're wasting out time! Stop using complete sentences!'

Nothing to say! Wouldn't wanna hear about it anyway!

'Is there such a thing as over communicating?'

"To be clear you are willing to labor under misconceptions?"

"I can't talk louder, I'm a little horse."

"I'm bilingual. I can talk to parents and step parents."

"I'm a great ... umm... like ... umm... like... umm ... communicator."

"There! Now we're getting somewhere."

"Let me know when you get tired of berries. We'll work on your people skills."