Commitment Critic Pillows

Preachers with far too much input

'...And then, I guess our relationship got TOO meaningful.'

"What's this for poorer stuff?"

'I want to finish with him, but I'll have to wait until he's made the final payment on my engagement ring.'

Two grooms/wedding guests raise a glass.

'Either you do or you don't - there isn't any 'cooling-off' period!'

'No, but thanks for asking.'

'I need someone who is willing to make a commitment not someone who's just interested in ruffling my feathers.'

A Reasonable Time for Concern

'And do you promise to be the one out of two marriages that does not end in divorce.'

"I need to know if you're really serious about our relationship."

"After two years of dating, we decided it was finally time to move in together."

'I didn't know the church sold an extended warrenty on marriage?'

"I have been happily married... three times!"

Monogamy

She agreed to marry me, but she has to marry three other guys first.

"Before I say, I do. Just let me run those vows past my best lawyer."

'We're looking for a minister who recognizes that relationships have a built in obsolesces.'

"Enemies, yes, but doesn't your moat also keep out love?"

'I'm writing my New Year's resolutions.' - 'I resolve to finish everything that I start.'

"'Better or worse' and 'richer or poorer' are NOT choices."

Single girl in wedding dress trying to catch a bachelor.

"Will you still love me when I'm old and past it?"

"You said it—everybody heard you."

'Either you do or you don't - there isn't any 'cooling-off' period!'

First Marriage

"When we met, Marc promised to be the wind under my wings but it turned out to be all hot air."

"And do you, Courtney, take this man....Courtney!"

"Will you sign a legally binding contract to get the state involved if you ever decide to leave me?"

". . . and do you, John, give up your smug air of bemused detachment for the demands of marriage?"

"The Tudballs got married by a judge. I still say a jury should have been present!"

"I need you, Roberta. Deep inside me there's a married man aching to get out."

I think my girlfriend is moving in.

"We're planning a very long shelf life together."