Commitment Consultants Gifts

'Whoa! Really? You offer a full refund on any engagement ring for up to two years?! Very cool!'

Relationship Warning Lights

"She can walk the walk, but can she talk the talk?"

"The whole time we were dating, he kept saying, 'You can't catch me, I'm the Gingerbread Man!"

"What's this for poorer stuff?"

"I don't think you're taking this relationship seriously..."

'No, but thanks for asking.'

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice a favourite, and entrusted by his master.

A Reasonable Time for Concern

"Before I say, I do. Just let me run those vows past my best lawyer."

Monogamy

She agreed to marry me, but she has to marry three other guys first.

"Enemies, yes, but doesn't your moat also keep out love?"

'I'm writing my New Year's resolutions.' - 'I resolve to finish everything that I start.'

"And do you, Courtney, take this man....Courtney!"

"No, I don't think our marriage would benefit from a mission statement."

'What do you mean, you're having second thoughts...?'

Woman thinking - "But is it a real relationship?"

"I need you, Roberta. Deep inside me there's a married man aching to get out."

"I'm always committing to things I know I can't follow through on."

"You will awake feeling refreshed...."

Marriage & Divorce.

"Monogamy? In this economy?"

'I'm sorry, but 'I'll see how I feel on the night' isn't really acceptable.'

'And promise to love each other through constant drama, bad judgment, poor choices and self-delusion?'

'I now pronounce you husband vs. wife.'

'This is my wife, Viola, who I've been happily married to for twenty five years.'

Spark Notes Wedding Vows

"I agreed to 'for better' and 'for worse,' but never to 'for mysterious' and 'withholding'."

"I said to him eventually, I said marriage is something you're just going to have to do on your own."

'Look, it's nothing to be ashamed of. We chose to get married before living together.'

"And where exactly is Timbuktu?"

"I did say I wanted to get married, but that was a false positive."

'I have an even better idea, Steve -- let's get married without living together!'

'You're nice, but I'll need to run your proposal by my attorney, accountant, web master,job coach and HMO.'