Commentary Aficionado Gifts

Tony Greig

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

Boardroom sacrifice - 'Then we agree - the shareholders don't have to know what transpired here today.'

"We do not usually acknowledge unsolicited manuscripts, but we want you to know that we tore yours into tiny pieces. Yours sincerely, The Op-Ed Page."

Corporate Darwinism

Beggar tosses money to the 1%.

'You cant do anything these days without someone suspecting your motives. . . there is only one way out. . . inaction.'

"Social distancing has really changed things at the office. In some ways it's really improved relationships with colleagues. For instance..."

Bank Cuts Jobs. . . Employees in Need!

"The tricky bit is finding some UK infrastructure that's working to switch it off."

One Man's Bliss Is Another's Nightmare

"I work all winter on my beach body, and everyone still stares at you!"

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack Goes To College

Ever Wonder Why 37& of Americans Prefer Socialism?

QANON PROUD BOY

Coffin floating out of outflow pipe.

If you want to get big as a radio host, you've got to differentiate yourself from all the other mean, insulting critics. I have a plan. You need to start being nice. That way, you'll really surprise people when you turn on them. That's the stupidest @#$% Idea I've ever heard, you muscle-bound ape! It needs work. Damn. What if I retract the muscle-bound part?

'Yes, itis pretty nasty! You've got sue the medical profession syndrome.'

"What about 'Liar, liar pants on fire'?"

"I know absolutely nothing about that subject, but I will give you my opinion."

"He's checking the math for political correctness."

'For God's sake step back and let the TV cameras through!'

Obama: "I'm losing the daily editorial cartoonists!"

"Who am I to question our government's policies? I'll tell you who I am! I'm Bernard A. Nesbitt, who reads the 'Times,' the 'Wall Street Journal,' the 'Post,' 'Newsweek,' 'Time,' 'Business Week,' 'U.S.News & World Report,' 'Look,' 'Life,' and 'Saturday Evening Post.' That's who I am!"

"Remember, sir, spin control is passe. Just lie your ass off."

'It's the only place they're allowed to advertise any more.'

TV SALES, 'Will the violence chip block out James Carville?'

Joe's: 'Opinions on anything & everything!'

'Alf did you see they have frozen the sum you can leave before tax?'

CSI: Low Budget Version

'If you're going to San Fransisco, you can't wear a flower in your hair these days, sir.'

'It cost a mint to educate him. If you want his opinion, you'll have to pay for it.'

"Can someone explain to me how, being here, are supposed to maintain physical distance?"

"Like, weirdest date ever, last night, he kept trying to make eye contact!"

"With the cost of accommodation around here we don't get anything like the range of candidates we used to..."