Commentary Aficionado Pillows

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

Corporate Darwinism

"We do not usually acknowledge unsolicited manuscripts, but we want you to know that we tore yours into tiny pieces. Yours sincerely, The Op-Ed Page."

Boardroom sacrifice - 'Then we agree - the shareholders don't have to know what transpired here today.'

Beggar tosses money to the 1%.

"Social distancing has really changed things at the office. In some ways it's really improved relationships with colleagues. For instance..."

"The tricky bit is finding some UK infrastructure that's working to switch it off."

'You cant do anything these days without someone suspecting your motives. . . there is only one way out. . . inaction.'

"I work all winter on my beach body, and everyone still stares at you!"

Coffin floating out of outflow pipe.

QANON PROUD BOY

'Yes, itis pretty nasty! You've got sue the medical profession syndrome.'

"What about 'Liar, liar pants on fire'?"

"I know absolutely nothing about that subject, but I will give you my opinion."

"He's checking the math for political correctness."

'If you're going to San Fransisco, you can't wear a flower in your hair these days, sir.'

"Remember, sir, spin control is passe. Just lie your ass off."

Obama: "I'm losing the daily editorial cartoonists!"

'It cost a mint to educate him. If you want his opinion, you'll have to pay for it.'

"Who am I to question our government's policies? I'll tell you who I am! I'm Bernard A. Nesbitt, who reads the 'Times,' the 'Wall Street Journal,' the 'Post,' 'Newsweek,' 'Time,' 'Business Week,' 'U.S.News & World Report,' 'Look,' 'Life,' and 'Saturday Evening Post.' That's who I am!"

'It's the only place they're allowed to advertise any more.'

'Alf did you see they have frozen the sum you can leave before tax?'

'For God's sake step back and let the TV cameras through!'

Joe's: 'Opinions on anything & everything!'

"Can someone explain to me how, being here, are supposed to maintain physical distance?"

"Like, weirdest date ever, last night, he kept trying to make eye contact!"

Hell or paradise = New York or Moscow