Commentary Fan Gifts

"Don't wake him, he's listening to the cricket."

"No, no, I'd say one has to be on Charlie Rose three times before one is really a talking head."

QANON PROUD BOY

"It's good to know she was butchered for a noble cause."

The commentators want to run the officials...

"Or we could turn on the TV and let younger, more beautiful people have sex for us."

Bluewater security man stopping baby with hood.

I break for toilet paper

Whatever Happened to Basic Standards at Newspapers?

How Will They Manage without Us?

'She's dealing multiple prescriptions. This is the 3rd pharmacy today where she got these highly addictive Chocolate Bits.'

"This guy looks like he's really out of touch."

Lane restricted to cars with three or more persons at least one of whom is a woman or visible minority.

Alpha males through the ages!

"She's genetically modified, you know."

In doctor's surgery: 'I'm terribly worried, doctor...he doesn't talk back to Bill O'Reilly anymore.'

Leftie Trump

"It's true she's back to the same weight she was on her wedding day, but remember that she was 9 months pregnant with triplets then..."

"I hear you're something big in the city?"

"And yet, I too am a still life."

'Cannibalism has always repulsed me - until i tasted Aunty Judy's knees'

"International Women's Day... When do men get their day?"

Bureaucrats Resting On Hercules Soldier.

The Limits of Satire

"You think you have it bad? I look like this and I don't know anything about technology."

"They don’t seem to mind us — it's the humans they want to keep away."

"Martha, are you sure you're not marrying me for money?"

"I'm crossing the road to keep my social distance."

Woman on a Pedestal. . . Who Married the Mothers Boy.

Death to Stultophobia

"It's not as if I invented the food chain."

'Hi - I'm from the Government, and I'm here to implant this little chip in your brain.'

"Does my bum look big in this?"

'Uh oh. Cougar alert.'

Do not allow your owner to foul the footpath.