Comical Foodie Gifts

"RFK Jr. demands transparency of food supply, FDA traces source of corned beef and cabbage."

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

Bangers and Mash

'I think I'll go home and eat'

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

The British Territory of the South Sandwich Islands.

'Lining my pockets with aluminum foil so I can sneak Thanksgiving leftovers home.'

"Great job of acting! You really appeared excited about Aunt May's 'famous' green bean casserole."

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

'You're supposed to just lick the cone!'

"I'm just the bus boy but I'll be ignoring you also."

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

F&E Diner. I'll bet you want the alphabet soup, right? Hey! Don't put words in my mouth!

As I say, local produce, locally produced; all our meats tonight come form our local meat processing plant.

"I don't know where to begin, each dish has its own app."

Seafood: "Of course our food is fresh."

You are what you eat (Nuts).

'Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!' 'That's not soup! It's gumbo.'

Restaurant menu board: 'Day old - 2 day old - 3 day old'

"Hi, Honey. For dinner we're having Shis Kabob."

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

Weight Loss Counselor, out for a 400 calorie lunch.

"And your baskets include dead crickets, old socks, mice guts and toilet water."

NASA, 'I thought YOU were bringing a can opener!'

"[Old Steak Bone Tavern]"

'Today's special is yesterday's left-overs.'

Uncle Giving Boy a Mince Pie

"My lord, Sir Arthur is pleased to bid thee welcome to his food court."

'The escargots are underdone.'

'In case of fire, don't panic. Pay your bill then leave.'

"We only do salads. There's no need to keep warning customers that the plates are cold."