Comic Situation Admirer Pillows

'Dude! Quick! Jump in! We've got to balance the load!'

"Easy for you to say - you're cured!"

Iliadette.

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

'Now for today's numbers...'Bad Dogs' outnumbered 'Good Dogs' by two-to-one...'

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

"How could we be short? You had enough chocolate for everyone on our list!"

"It was the most relaxing massage I've ever had."

"Good news...turns out it was just your battery!"

'I hate to say this but no amount of analysis is going to help; you need a better cartoonist.'

"She left everything to you. But, the hamster is contesting the will."

Time management office worker

'OMG! Is it Christmas already?'

'What's your poisson?' (Man reading report on Farmed Salmon Toxins Scare).

Committee On Feline Healthcare

'Burf, I think the ants are trying to tell us something.

"Not wearing deodorant is not what I meant by 'respect the local customs'"

'That's the one that attacked me, officer! The one with the stupid look on his face!'

'I wouldn't worry about a poor sense of direction...'

"Your Majesty, this learned committee has done deep research on the subject, and we have come to one conclusion: queens often marry down."

The Awful Lawfuls Chapter 3

Woman stuck doing situps has spider web being built under arm

'You were nagging your husband all over the road. I'll need to see your marriage license.'

Phill Jupitus

"Previously on..."

Godzilla vs. Himself.

The only place it's okay to pick your nose.

Things we rarely hear: Bow...er...wow...er..um...woof/like tweet, I mean, y'know, tweet/whatchamacallit moo...

Running in please pass

I never know what to expect from those guys --- they're pretty loopy!

"Online I said I was 'blond and curvy', I didn't say I was a woman!"

"All I know is that one of them was raised by wolves, and the other was raised by geeks."

Adoption centre nurse accepting a bribe from a pack of wolves

"That's not what you told my screener you wanted to talk about."

"I do hope you've got enough for a sample, Mr Furse."