Comic Health Enthusiast Gifts

'I'll be glad to give you a second opinion but I don't know how much it's worth'

'Dear Diarrhea, Day 84. Well, I'm constipated again today...'

'Your 'bad' cholesterol levels are right off the chart.'

'Side effects may include....'

'I'm sorry, Louis. I should have warned you that I installed a speed bump in front of the refrigerator.'

'It's either a boo-boo or an owwie, but the doctors need to run some more tests before they decide.'

'You've got the worst case of whatever this is, I've ever seen.'

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

"I try to 'go with the flow' doc, but my prostate is an unwilling participant!"

"I've had a sore throat ever since we moved near the airport!"

M.D. You burned a hole in your stomach --- eat only bland foods from now on! No more spicy food?! It's a season-ending injury!

'I understand you know how to treat a woman.'

'Tell the doctor to hurry. It's an emergency. I just turned middle aged!'

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

Groups of menopausal women in clinic.

'I'm prescribing a laxative pill and a sleeping pill. Never, never take them together.'

"While you were under, I had all your friends come in and sign your heart stent."

"You have a heart murmur and I'm starting to hear your liver and kidneys complain."

'We can't afford advertising like this! That's one page for the drug and two just for the side effects!'

"Tell me Mr. Jones. Does it hurt when I do this?"

'I'm sending you to see another doctor, he's a specialist in hyperchondria.'

NHS notice - This is a bring your own bed hospital

"You're in the "Stone Age." You've got kidney stones, gall stones, and bladder stones."

"It says here you've been experiencing peels of thunder�"

'I don't want you to give up eating entirely -- just the food part.'

"How am I supposed to trust my gut when it can't even handle a little dairy?"

"I didn't even get a balloon."

"Try to eat more coconuts and fish."

'Yes doctor, it did hurt when you did that!'

'Hey, Lori! Take a look at Mr. Geckler's EKG!'

'The doctors ruled out a remarkable recovery. You'll get better, they just don't think it'll be all that remarkable.'

'Yes, it is a carrot. You haven't been getting enough fibre.'

"You'll have to take this medication for the rest of your life, but don't worry it's non-addictive."

'Key hole surgery....but wouldn't it be easier if you were actually in the room with me...'