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'I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and, doggonit, I'm not poorly drawn!'

'What can we do for you?' - 'I need a song removed from my mind.'

'I never have to clean up my room again. My Mom says this is the last time she's going to tell me.'

Thorn in a Lion's Paw

A man is sat between thugs on the subway.

"When were you planning to tell me about Hell?"

'And for insurance purposes...is this a pre-existing condition?'

"Do you see a puppy following me home in the future?"

'You can have him!' ' I don't want him!'

'One good thing about my record is all my crimes have been pardonable.'

'Have we been bio-engieering in the swamp?'

I realize that this is highly irregular, but I've decided to refer you to a plumber

'A guard's coming! Quick, fill in the hole!'

'It's called 'cause and effect.' I pound this log and Tarzan goes bananas.'

"I don't get it. People keep opening this door and setting off the alarm! Can't they read?!"

"To tell you the truth, even when I'm in water I don't feel that comfortable."

"I can't meet you in the park today. The cats suspect something."

"Harumph. Some 'sailor man.'"

"I'm a caveman, not a stay-at-cave man."

The Aftermath of Don Quixote's Fight With the Cat (Don Quixote).

"Oooooh, can we stop there? That's the one where they're super dumb and funny."

"Stop whining- I'm also an only child."

'What really worries me is that I was never baptized.'

Chris Evans

Yep, that was one serious paper cut

'The apple thing didn't work on my teacher. I was thinking, if you raised my allowance, I could try cash.'

City Water Department: 'Hello! Flood Control!'

Me Tarzan, you Cheeta

I assure you it's perfectly legal...

'I've thought about getting a part-time job, sir, but they tell me it might lead to the hard stuff.'

'Don't you think you are taking this qualifying for a bus pass thing a bit too far?'

"I don't know, Cheryl...I just feel trapped in this relationship."

"I finished my act. Could you come over and give me a hand?"

'Lance, the more I drink the funnier you get!'

'Fish with benefits.'