Comfort Innovator T-Shirts

"He built his own steps. Apparently, he's loving, smart and impatient."

"I just love the way you're so endlessly inventive in the bedroom."

Dog Nightmares

A man sees a leak in his ceiling and drills a hole in the floor under leak to by pass his apartment.

"Dad! Dad! It's freezing out here! I wish we had a fireplace to get all cozy and roast marshmallows!"

"Well, we're down to bare brick, natural wood, and raw nerves."

"And it comes with a coin filter for when you vacuum under the cushions."

'This was designed for people who have mastered easy chairs and want to attempt something more difficult.'

'I'm playing 18 floors.'

'He'll do the dishes now that I've attached an accelerator.'

And this model comes with a fitness tracker.

"Graham loved his creature comforts."

"1972: Kim and Doug invited us to their key party... Sounds groovy! 2017: We just got an evite from Kim and Doug to join them on an ayahuasca retreat in Peru... Tommy starts hockey and my father is about to die—no way."

"It's a novel about interest rates."

"What is it about a tee shirt cannon that says 'foreplay' to you?"

Sleepy Bunny

New! Paint Bombs: 'Light the wick, and you have paint that's extremely easy to apply!'

"Our smart home sure is sensitive. Every time I hammer a nail in the wall it screams."

"Any improvement since I brought the balloon?"

Television company new recruit

Playboy has rigged his car with a loveseat

"I don't need to get out of bed, ma - I programmed an app to live my life for me."

Executive wearing fluffy rabbit slippers.

'Ed says the 'smart money isn't buying furniture right now.'

"I guess the tux is just another brave act of resilience. I also spilled beans on my sweats."

"The rules don't say anything about Airbnb-ing your property to help pay off the mortgage."

Paper Bath Towels.

Either we've both woke up with a fever or we left the electric blanket on again.

Man painting the ceiling with the help of an umbrella.

'Let's at least give the parabolic mattress a try - the Thompsons swear it saved their marriage.'

TV announcement: 'The Consumer Product Safety Commission today announced the recall of all E-Z Reclino-Mat chairs sold between ...'

Patent Office. It's a global positioning system adapted to find the TV remote!

It's a beautiful day. Take your computer and invent the next crippling internet virus outside.

'These are great seats, Kenny'

"This new adjustable mattress really does stop your snoring!"