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65,000,000 B.C.

'Well, there's something you don't see every day'

"Ooh look Derek. A shooting star. Quick make a wish"

Reese Witherspoon

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"What the... mine are lunar eclipse glasses!"

"...And that's how to translate honey into money."

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

Frank and Ernest Celestial Accountants. How's the audit of the Bankrupt Universe, Inc. going, Ernie? At first I thought it was a personnel problem -- Halley's Comet shows up once every seventy-six years, the supernovas are a bunch of burnouts and of course planet Mercury only works eighty-eight days a year. But the real problem isn't personnel, it's corporate strategy! Strategy? What's wrong? Universe, Inc. thinks it can keep expanding and expanding forever and ever!

"This is no time for fightin', princess, there's a war on!"

'There goes any chance of us getting our security deposit back.'

"What are you doing?"

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

Meet Santa's entourage

Elton John

A word from James Cameron. . .

Brad Pitt.

"Once again, the epicenter seems to be Christian Slater."

Roger McGuinn

Charlotte Rampling

"Great, the end of the world and I'm going to be first on facebook with pictures!!"

"When did you first notice you were larger than life?"

Celebrity Gavin Henson

"This lovely song tells of a young, pretty actress, her ups and downs, and how she found happiness after rehab."

'Burke's B-list celebrities.'

Emma Watson

Sylvester Stallone

Rod Stewart

Pile of books for sale with sign: Expired Fifteen-Minutes-of-Fame Books.

"Accepting for..."

Adam Levine

Pop star weather report.

"I'm wearing Donna Karan."

"I'm not sure I'd want fifteen minutes of fame. Mum would only follow it with fifteen minutes of criticism."

"You're okay for a guy who comes across as such a jerk in his biopic."