Comedy Lover In Medicine Gifts

"Our regular anaesthesiologist called in sick today."

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

'I checked the database, Mrs. Nimitz. There's no such symptom.'

"Because we dismissed his original self-diagnosis, he wants to give us his second opinion."

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

"Reverend, I recommend you turn the other cheek."

'It may be more inconvenient, but the 'Reverse Prostate Exam' is a lot less embarrassing for the both of us.'

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

'Good thing it has a child-proof cap.'

I said, your bones ache because you’re old. I’m referring you to an archaeologist.

"You'll feel a pinch and then a burn."

'Quick, do a background search and see if this doctor passed his boards!'

Brian surgeon squeezing brains from a tube.

'Restless Peg Syndrome.'

'The doctor will be with you shortly, he's finishing medical school.'

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

There's Nothing Worse Than A Staff Infection

'What do you mean you're the new Paediatric Specialist?'

"Looks like your Yang is on the move again."

'Cock-a-doodle-doo!' 'Cut back on the chicken soup.'

"I expect a speedy recovery,"

"We can give you enough medication to alleviate the pain, but not enough to make it fun."

'Can't you give the dummy mouth to mouth without getting romantically involved Mrs Wilks?'

'And I think you'll find something extra in your dessert, Hon.'

Until Bob entered her life, Lisa never even knew the meaning of the phrase 'acute multiple drug-resistant infection by transgenic Staphylococcus aureus.

Radiology, Cardiology and Fertility Clinic.

"Dr. Eliot, would you let the dog out?"

How To Make A Pigs Ear Out Of Swine Flu.

"So, when will we be getting the next batch?"

'Turn the other cheek, reverend.'

"I came here to be treated - not flattered!"