Comedy Card Collector Pillows

greeting cards.

Occu-Pie Mars

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

A large leaf falling on a dog

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Banana Split...

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

Snowmobull

'Rover isn't any good at catching frisbees. You've heard of stone hands?...he's got a stone mouth.'

Turtle Hat

'Big sale at the Dog Store. Buy 1, get 2 free.'

E-Baying @ The Moon

Filet minion

'Excuse me could you please direct me to the nearest toilet?'

"The Eggsorcist"

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

'Crushing empty beer cans is for wimps.'

Thank you bubbles

"Oh no. Is that my ex?"

A trevor of trainspotters

Santa called but you were out!

"Blast, you've cleaned me out again!" Grey squirrels out competing red squirrel for food.

"Yes, if that towel weighs 25 lbs that would explain the reading."

"Just toot my horn and I'll be there."

'I reckon we need a new sweeper.'

"Whose the new guy?"

Philosopher trading cards.

The Card Flinger

What happened when the bond issues failed during the building of the Great Wall of China: The Great Picket Fence of China.