Comedic Card Collector Pillows

Belated $3 birthday cards. 'Darn. All I've got is two bucks.' Bob was always a day late and a dollar short.

Sorry to hear about your accident.

"It says in lieu of gifts, we should not show up."

Santa called but you were out!

"What's the name of the drug I've been taking to improve my memory?"

'I checked the database, Mrs. Nimitz. There's no such symptom.'

Surf Casting

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

'Wow, talk about shedding!'

"We don't observe 'casual Fridays' here."

Thank you bubbles

"Just toot my horn and I'll be there."

"Blast, you've cleaned me out again!" Grey squirrels out competing red squirrel for food.

Philosopher trading cards.

The Card Flinger

'Gents toilet? Ah, got me there...'

Greeting card section: 'thank you' and 'you're welcome'.

'After a Gadzillon glasses of milk and cookies who wouldn't have an upset stomach?'

'Look at that! Our first big snowfall, Timmy!'

The African Plains during the 70's.

Hades Movie Awards After Show. The dealy sins were all here -- They love walking the red carpet! Pride won tonight for a leading role and envy won for a supporting role. Wrath was seen yelling at at the paparazzi ... Lust tried to meet beautiful actresses ... and Gluttony rushed off to the buffet. Greed is already counting all the money he'll make because he won an award. And when sloth won, he received the night's biggest ovation ... because he was too lazy to give an acceptance speech!

'I'm a football referee - I'll have a box of red and a box of yellow.'

Card shark

Red Card - Gold Card.

Business people buying greeting cards.

To diet or not...?

"I'm looking for a card that says 'Your Love Is Priceless' for under $5."

Husband / Wife / On The Side

Never date a medical illustrator.

"Can't you read? Our shipment is late."

'He's disappointed with the Queen's card - he wanted a rude one!'

"Unlike the case for dogs, the people that cats own don't grow to look like them. I mean, seriously, what human could look as good as this?"

Cards: Wedding / You've Changed / You don't Understand Me / I'm Leaving! / I'm going for a pint!

'Occassional cards'

'I want one that says 'get lost' but includes a pocket compass.'