Comedic Moment Collector Gifts

'Don't just stand there...get the camcorder!'

'I checked the database, Mrs. Nimitz. There's no such symptom.'

Surf Casting

'Wow, talk about shedding!'

"We don't observe 'casual Fridays' here."

Clown's Cuckoo Clock.

'Gents toilet? Ah, got me there...'

'Look at that! Our first big snowfall, Timmy!'

"Baldo, Gracie...you need to learn more Spanish. For the rest of the week, I'm going to speak nothing but Spanish, and Tia Carmen will act as your interpreter, OK? Tienen tarea?"

Wind shear - 81 st and Lex

Hades Movie Awards After Show. The dealy sins were all here -- They love walking the red carpet! Pride won tonight for a leading role and envy won for a supporting role. Wrath was seen yelling at at the paparazzi ... Lust tried to meet beautiful actresses ... and Gluttony rushed off to the buffet. Greed is already counting all the money he'll make because he won an award. And when sloth won, he received the night's biggest ovation ... because he was too lazy to give an acceptance speech!

"Simple tasks were a challenge for Chad. Awww, geez. Another upside down spoon."

To diet or not...?

'I was walking past the washers and dryers and one of my socks disappeared.'

'The hair plugs are that noticeable, huh?'

"Wife and two hernias to support!"

"Unlike the case for dogs, the people that cats own don't grow to look like them. I mean, seriously, what human could look as good as this?"

'On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the highest, how attached are you to the cat?'

'My graduation gown got lost at the cleaners. Think anyone will notice this Snuggie?'

"Note to self...'NICE APPS' is not a good opening line."

Private View.

Darth Vader advertises nasal strips.

Foreigners in Paris - The great water displays at Versailles!

'Look, Mom. I'm belly dancing.'

Son on the shoulders of Mum on the shoulders of Dad so he can feed a giraffe

"It's the only 'L' word you can click on."

"I brought popcorn..."

"Always wondered what happened if you tried to drive through without a card."

'Mum! There's something in the paddling pool.'

Dog on skates.

"Is this your first time with an undercover cop?"

That always happens when you look at that damn watch!

Authentic signed Holy Grail

'And...?'

Look who's headed this way. It's Darlene. How do I look? Desperate and pathetic. She's engaged. She's not interested. You've got to move on. No way, she has to be here for a reason. This won't go well. One coffee to go. I do.