Comedic Jester Pillows

'Toupee or not toupee? - That is the question.'

Trump the Jester

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

Pretty girls listen patiently. They know you'll soon get tongue-tied and won't be able to talk anymore.

Dog fetching clown shoes.

"I love a woman with a sense of humour."

Books / Coffee table books

"I'd have been here sooner if it hadn't been for early detection."

'How am I going to get all this back in the tube?'

Cheap amusement with... THE HAPPY COUPLE!

'Wait while I slip on something more comfortable.'

"They're a perfect match – she's high-maintenance, and he can fix anything."

"Will you manage my portfolio?"

"I'm not very good at sex, but what do you say to eight hours uproarious sleep?"

'He's sending 2,400 roses to win her back, and charging it to her credit card.'

Monks play conkers with crucifix

Luring the babes is a cinch when you've got the right feet for the job.

"Gracie, don't worry so much about your big test... You know, when I was your age, I didn't know the meaning of the word 'fear'. Until I looked it up."

Boyfriend scores notches on wall by bed.

"The Real Reason For Global Warming."

'Houston, you're not going to believe this...'

"If you love me you'd eat all the coconut ones I don't like."

At The Clown Bank.

"To be honest I'd rather make love not war, but my chat-up lines are terrible."

Pin your hopes and dreams on the donkey

Mama Z'Belle...astrologer...your fortune based on the science of astronomy: 'Oh, oh it looks like your chart has shifted red...'

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

"Yuck! Som'one left their nose in this book!"

'You told me I should be more affectionate, so I got myself two girlfriends!'

"Before I start today's sermon let's take 5 minutes to view the highlights reel from the last 3 Sundays..."

Poet's Corner