Comedic Horror Lover Pillows

'I'm not trying to take away from the fact that you are a twisted, brilliant genius. . .but what is with the size of this bloody forehead?!?'

'They all laughed when I told them that I was going to marry a magician.'

Doglike man to vampire: 'Call me an apprentice werewolf, or even a beginner werewolf, but don't call me an under werewolf!'

'Well, now we know why Dracula's been getting all the girls lately.'

"Do you live nearby by any chance? I hate to eat in public."

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

'Looks like the victim was trying to tell us something,'

"And last week I nearly crashed while reading on the freeway..."

'Yes, I'm fiercely opposed to stem cell research.'

Mayhem, Inc. Part 2

She did only twenty-eight of the thirty-two fouetts in the Black Swan pas de deux . . . or are my eyes deceiving me?

"I want to be upfront. At this point, I'm only looking for a casual hookup of Frankenstein."

Vampire shaving cut dilemma.

Professor Van Helsing's long and successful career as a vampire hunter, came to a sudden end due to woodworm.

Candle Size

The other day during the zombie apocalypse

Igor's zombie predecessor had a short-lived career assisting Dr. Frankenstein.

'You Have a food allergy. Even worse it's to 'O' type!'

2 mummies...

Pinata Crime Scene Investigation.

"He goes to the bathroom a lot. Where did you get the kidneys?"

Vampire Sit ups

'So I finally got cable.'

A boast of ghosts

Zombie scout issues

'I'm here to read the meter.'

'I didn't recognize your old boyfriend at first. He's got a new car.'

"Okay, who wants a wrap, who gets a steak and who's the fish?"

A vein of vampires

How Am I Scaring?

"Just as I expected, Mrs Frimley. You've got vampires."

Venn Diagram of 'love' and 'horror films'

Just unburied.

'...He's an out of control freak.'

'Man, can't find the keys again! Now do you think these things would come with a light? No, that would make too much sense!'