Comedic Fitness Observer Gifts

'Wow! That yogapilates has really paid off!'

"My computer just texted me."

Runner going through hurdles.

"We'll be single again in Heaven, right?"

"Hey! This is news."

"Don't think of it as hell. . . just think of it as a normally recurring seasonal weather pattern."

Glimpses One Dollar

'I'm knitting you sweater... do you want it too big or too small?'

Men and Women's changing rooms

'Well, at least we were able to remove that pesky hangnail. So, you have to be pretty stoked about that."

Jeff was watching his weight.

'This is my favorite machine in the gym.'

"For my next trick, I'll need a non-litigious volunteer."

Screenwasher cleaning buggy.

'Explain to me again how a trip to the mall to buy shoelaces resulted in this!'

"What's the big deal? All these politicians talk about a health care plan! I have a health care plan!"

"What they hell are we looking at."

"Okay, but just a quick kiss, Joey... You did see my father's gun collection, right?"

"Four out of five doctors recommend that you get up and get some exercise."

'Mismatched Mantras'

"Mom said to make sure you don't goof up shopping online."

'Yes, it does make his blood boil - I enjoy it'

'My parents are having a fight right now.'

"I was gonna try yoga, but I don't actually bend so that's not going to work."

'You're new here, aren't you.'

Kids seem to sense when Pesach is drawing near.

'That's not what I had in mind when I asked for some encouragement!'

"When the next lockdown comes, I might actually get on it."

THINK (sign nailed inappropreatly to wall)

"I had to turn that show off. I got tired of waiting."

Man Looking At Painting

"Harold, I think your obsession about your weight is getting out of hand!"