Comedic Environmentalist Gifts

"That is cave bear. Free range bear better ethical choice."

"They're nice, but not as efficient as my coal-powered chimes."

Petrol for Regular and Large cars.

It's not Global Warming silly: I bought a plastic plant...

"Gavin is a bit conflicted when it comes to barbecuing."

Yomp Foundation Presentation committee: 'Don't let the gong intimidate you!'

'It's an extinction notice.'

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

'Been waiting long?'

Zoo: No Hunting.

Winter Weather.

'Now cut that out!'

Recycling bottle bank.

Genetic Fingerprinting.

Fish Posting No Fishing Sign

"There Adam. Isn't that a lot more comfortable than that silly little fig leaf?"

'He keeps grounding out the energy flow.'

Hunter with arrow pointing at him.

'Don't call the Nobel Committee just yet: We forgot to calibrate the instruments before the experiment...'

"Before I start. . . . are you sure pruning doesn't violate the tree's rights?"

'This stuff is all well and good son, but when are you going to get a proper job?'

"I hope you love me for my money, not for who I am."

'I'm sorry Martha, but I've fallen in love with a light bulb.'

"If there is a heaven, why do we end up as fossil fuel?"

I must be losing my grip, he didn't query the bill...

'As soon as I mention Nietzsche - stop serving me, okay.'

Trump to Build Wall

"We got him onto an exercise bike, but I'm afraid it was too late."

'Listen son-if God had wanted us to fly he would have given us air tickets.'

"If atheism is a religion, why hasn't it broken up into splinter groups who murder each other?"

"Don't think of it as forgetting stuff. Think of it as freeing up brain space."

'We've minimized your tax liability by losing a lot of your principle.'

This is where Brent council sends you

'Well, you heard wrong -- Zen Buddhism doesn't have a Missouri Synod.'

"We should take life one step at a time." "OK, but not right now...there's some dogs do-do right in front of us!"