Comedic Cannabis Enthusiast Gifts

Old men,"I have terrible trouble with my joints..the cannabis keeps falling out."

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

Wedding Day Itinerary.

"I'll faithfully follow any diet plan as long as you also prescribe medical marijuana."

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

"L.L. Bean slippers... $25.00 Ambulance ride to hospital... $500.00 X-rays of spine... $350.00 Three refills of hydrocodone... priceless!"

Medical Marijuana Dispensary / Medical Cheez Doodles Dispensary

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

The discoverer of fire meets the discoverer of marijuana

"Remember that '70s TV show 'What's Happening'!? Did they ever come up with an answer?" "I don't know, but it makes me wonder if Marvin Gaye found out what's going on." "The black hole of cannabis-induced queries"

'Please, could you me to Polish my diet!'

Pelobong

"There is a medical use for marijuana. I sold it to pay my tuition at medical school."

''It's me or your stupid racing pigeons' I said - then immediately regretted it.'

'Take two tokes of weed, Mrs Grunfield, and call me in the morning.'

"He's been like that ever since he stopped eating the stuff and began smoking it."

"Nah, dude, I'm Tokey Bear. Smokey's on vacation. Hey you got any snacks?"

"You come highly recommended. I like that."

"Medical marijuana hotline...press hash to continue."

Cannabis Dispensary: Walk-ins awkwardly trying to look nonchalant welcome!

"All agreed? We buy low and sell high."

"Compliments of the chef - Our finest blend of 'Maui Wowie' dated 1972."

Hippie Edibles Co.

'Join us. There' a talk on medical marijuana and a pot-luck dinner afterward.'

Nobody warned Marge that a side effect of a hip replacement is feeling more hippy.

"Young lady! You aren't going anywhere dressed like that!"

"You heading south again this summer?"

Caterpillar Paranoia

"Remember the night in the Tetons when we smoked so much weed we thought we were hallucinating?"

"Looks like we left out the wrong brownies."

'I'm asking for a transfer to California because that's where you get the really good stuff.'

"My joints... are almost done"

"I've tried Buddhism, Taoism, Transendental meditation, Confucionism, Theolog, Scientgology....but I've found a good hand rolled joint of homegrown works best!"

"Say, Bill, how's that new crop of yours doing?"

Stoner Dog