Comedic Bird Tales Gifts

"Come on Bob, you know it's against the rules to plan your trip: You're a Wandering Albatross!"

"Don't forget to leave me a wakeup call so I can get the worm!"

''What's in the bag, lady?''

Why doesn't birdie go soaring on high like other birds?

'That's a quack-quack'. Ornithological conference.

"Wanna get pigeon holed?"

"I'm the bluebird of PMS. Fetch me some decaf and turn on the air conditioner. I'm burning up in here!"

A couple of birds out on the town.

"Well, that backfired."

"Bird of paradise, my ass."

"It wasn't as good as his first book, 'Eating Worms.'"

"I don't feel like going out. Why don't just the two of us stay in and open a can of worms?"

Closed for Summer.

'Oh boy, lucky you were there: I was cramping up. I need a few minutes rest if you don't mind...'

"Let's go to one of those places where they regurgitate the meal right at your table."

"M'lud, my client has no choice but to plead guilty to the charge of jaywalking as he is,in fact a jay."

The late bird orders a take away.

"I keep telling you, poppy-seed bagels are nothing but trouble."

"Wow, the gossip is that these guys are not mere birdwatchers, they're professional ornithologists here to study us! What an honour!"

"Shall I sing like the wild Atlantic canary or the domesticated yellow canary?"

"Suddenly I can't think of anything to chirp."

Pecking order - pecking out of order.

"Don't worry. He's got unlimited minutes."

'This kookaburra he's talking to-they're AUSTRALIAN aren't they?'

'Rodney, you're not feeling well?'

"Molting or non molting?"

'Polly wants a cracker!' 'Maybe we should switch to low-carb crackers?!'

Power Struggle Between Vet and Chimp.

"You're such a hoot, Owen!"

'Aw! Look - someone with a bigger beak than mine...'

"Tell your mother I'm going out for cigarettes."

'Nice! Just throw the food on the dirty ground! Thanks, Lady!'

"Wow! This is the legendary giant desert vulture! Don't let it go, Gary! Don't let it go!!"