Literary Birds Gifts

"It wasn't as good as his first book, 'Eating Worms.'"

Polly txt speak

So you're a mocking bird...

"If we only repeat what humans say whenever they're nearby... they won't realize we're aliens plotting to take over the planet."

Birds reading over woman's shoulder

"Lovely dovetail."

The Book Lover

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

'That's a quack-quack'. Ornithological conference.

Cat with Crown.

'Hang on. Let's not get ahead of ourselves. Apparently that's not a good idea.'

Bookworm Romance

"Bird of paradise, my ass."

'When I said we should read together I meant separate books.'

'Polly want many things, but a cracker isn't among them.'

Closed for Summer.

"Your cholesterol level is through the roof!! When you die, may I hang you up in my garden for the blue tits..?"

'Stop me if you've heard this one before.'

The Weekly Poultry Reading was Short-Lived.

Scientist taking air quality reading on roof with canary wearing gas mask.

"Shall I sing like the wild Atlantic canary or the domesticated yellow canary?"

Mouse reading magazine, "Mouse and garden"

"She does bird impressions."

The Swan.

"Sorry, but I've decided to start doing my own material."

'Rodney, you're not feeling well?'

'I can't believe you just said that Satchel's writing is better than mine.'

"Come on Bob, you know it's against the rules to plan your trip: You're a Wandering Albatross!"

Prof. Flocking was very influential on campus. Particularly amongst the Ornithologist."

"I contain multitudes."

'Thanks for the good wishes, but I don't think that reading 'Chicken Soup for the Soul' will make me feel better.'

'Don't be silly -- how can a PARROT be part Scottish?'

'Parry has an insight...' "That chicken you're always eating..is that a bird?"