Comedian In Scrubs Prints

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

Golfing Boss

On the back of the t-shirt...

"And I want you to meet Coco, your anesthesiologist."

'The results of your physical exam are fine, except for your reflexes: They're more 'dog-like' than 'cat-like'.'

'What's holding him up?'

Surgeon carving a chicken/turkey.

'I thought my appointment was for a TB screening.'

In, Out, Shake it all about

'You sloth and gluttony guys have it easy -- I'm here for envy!'

'Hi, I'm Dr.Jones. Sorry about my little prank, but it saves us a fortune in enemas.'

"In this company the managers and workers see eye to eye...you just have to ask the caretaker for a ladder."

'Who's ready for laughter-- the best medicine?!!!'

Bloke orders a pizza as Jesus divides the loafs and fishes

Celebration in operating theatre.

'Yes, my opinion today is the opposite of what I said yesterday. In my position, this is called 'flexibility', in your position, it would be called 'unreability''.

'Please excuse my nurse -- this is her first day on the job.'

"Why am I a nurse? In my former lives I was a mind-reader, a juggler and a scribe."

'It's just a precaution, the anesthetist can't find his wedding ring.'

'How am I ever going to be able to practice my first aid if you insist on using an electric razor?'

"I'm removing the liver.. No, the kidneys... Presure, pressure, what's that blobby thing?"

"This cabernet sauvignon will have you feeling more like yourself in no time."

"And I suppost you've never had a friendly wager with a colleague?"

'That filet mignon was supposed to be your last meal? Whoops-a-daisy!'

'Will you stop saying 'try not to get blood all over everything!'.'

"I just had these linen scrubs dry-cleaned!"

And what will it be today? The mask of comedy or tragedy?

'Regarding the surgery you just had - I hope you have a good sense of humour.'

'When the aliens abducted and probed me, they said I was fine. But I'd like a second opinion.'

"Doctor - can I administer my own anaesthetic?"

'He's in a meeting. Would you like to speak to his assistant?'

'No kidding? You're the bluebird of mutually assured destruction deterrants?'

'We just need to increase our collision policy enough to cover the amount of damage to our car from Joy backing into our neighbor's car, rick.'