College President Gifts

"With the cuts in Education... why are they dancing?"

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."

'Hmph. College kids.'

"This is the most important election of our lifetime."

Reagacentennial

"What was I thinking?!"

"The president demands that staff take responsibility for failures, and the multi-trillion deficit is down to YOU!"

"I have a recurring nightmare that I've taken a test, and the professor won't give me an 'A'."

Barack Obama's To Do list.

'As meetings go that was one of my better ones!'

'Unemployed math grad. Will solve quadratic equations for food."

Surprised chicken: 'I know. I can't believe it either.'

"No, the Geo Metros, Hyundais, Rabbits, and Kias belong to faculty - the Alfa Romeos, BMWs, and Volvos belong to students."

John F. Kennedy

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

'What I have to do first?!'

"Gracie, what does a little girl like you wish for? I mean, besides being a doctor, a motivational speaker, a great parent and becoming president?"

Through These Hallowed Halls, walks Our Future - "Talk about putting pressure on a guy!"

'You have failed on all counts...'

Subatomic particles

What Does God Know?

'Sir, you inaugural speech is simply wonderful. I would just suggest you say 'dear employees' instead of 'hey, you bunch of lousy slaves'.'

'Let's go home and come back next year. It's Ground Hog Deficit!'

"This guy might like fiddling with numbers, Dad – but is he any good at sums?"

Big Fish Little Fish Cardboard Box.

The Giamatti era

'There's a gentleman out here with $643 million. He would like to discuss a takeover.'

"There's the pressure from my public, naturally, as well as the pressure from my publisher, my agent, and all that. But the real pressure comes from that devil inside that makes me different from other men, that makes me a writer. But, of course, you know all about pressure, grinding out those papers at Sarah Lawrence."

A new career for George W. Bush: taster in a pretzel factory.

'Mark my words! Our enemies will test this young guy with a huge international crisis as soon as he's electe! But don't worry, he'll be fine!', 'Come here, Joe -- let me give you a nice fist bump!'

The president of a company see a sign: While you were out we hit the lottery!

I didn't want to become the company president, but the board of directors left me no choice. You were backed into a corner office.

'We're counting on inflation.'

Businessman feeding the vultures

Smart Bomb.