College Preparation Gifts

"Writing about your community service is good, but I would play down the court-ordered part."

'Your pediatrician? No. . . I'm your baby's college admissions representatives.'

Blew off my S.A.T. prep class.

"So I think I'm going to do my college essay on 'Overcoming Adversity'."

"Hey, there's Sara, padding her college-entrance résumé!"

"We want you to have fund, as long as it's fun that enhances a college-admission application."

'I started a whole new business, Mom! Kids are paying me to complete their college applications.'

Contest to enter the University

"He doesn't know it's for his college fund. We had it made from bullet proof glass."

"The counselor wasn't much help about getting into college. All he said was to study hard and get good grades."

"Isn't Gracie getting a little old for bedtime stories?"

"Today we're filling out mock college applications."

"Aren't you young to be worrying about college?"

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

Continuing education.

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

"One year closer to college!"

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

"Someday, Sweetheart, you’ll look back on this day and think to yourself, ‘Covid ruined my college experience.’"

'Of course, I'm argumentative.. I'm PRE-LAW, for goodness sake!'

Finally I understand why it's called 'Higher Education!'

"And in the category of 'The Most Amazing Comeback from an Academic Nosedive,' the winner is..."

Rita's PhD defense wasn't going well."

Trust

'You have failed on all counts...'

"My papie says I'm going to be the first in my family to go to college!"

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

"Where am I going to college? I thought this was college."

'I wish his guidance counselor spent more time on college plans and less time suggesting names for his band.'

"If we learned anything in law school, we learned that you can never have enough wiggle room."

'Does it matter what answer I put down? After all, this is Liberal Arts.'

'I've decided to put off college, and hitchhike around the cat.'