College Experience Gifts

"I wish my Dad would get off my back! It's only been nine years and he wants to know if I've picked a major yet!"

"Look, if it makes you feel any better, Nana and Poppa are still paying off their student loans."

'Mo got a hardship grant to attend university.'

The Art Student.

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

'Hmph. College kids.'

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

College. Did you pick a major yet? I'm doing a double major in art and logic --- I want to draw my own conclusions!

"Like I could date a guy from Notre Dame."

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

Continuing education.

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

"One year closer to college!"

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

Math Major Pennants. ISOSCELES. SCALENE EQUILATERAL.

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

"I have a recurring nightmare that I've taken a test, and the professor won't give me an 'A'."

"My homework ate my dog."

'I'm supposed to take a geography test and I can't find the right room!'

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

Kardiff.

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

I'm getting ready to apply for college. Do you have a list of party schools?

"Maybe he's so sad that he's leaving us to go to college that he actually looks happy. Please don't ruin it for me with reality."

"Academic freedom doesn't mean you're free not to study."

"Someday, Sweetheart, you’ll look back on this day and think to yourself, ‘Covid ruined my college experience.’"

Santa does a keg stand.

'The Great Depression? Didn't they have Prozac then?'

"Don't tell me, first time away from home, right?"

'Junior's writing has improved. His letters from college pleading for more money, are froceful and flawlessly written.'

'Of course, I'm argumentative.. I'm PRE-LAW, for goodness sake!'

'When I was studying animal husbandry, I met the animal who became my husband.'